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Rant The Minecraft Movie teaser is the worst thing I have ever seen.

Acheeto hitting the nail on the head with the hammer or however it goes
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>commentary channels
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i feel like i've experienced all 5 stages of grief and i'm now at acceptance
this shit is coming out in april 2025, they're not fixing it, the movie is over. it's honestly not the minecraft movie i would have wanted but it's probably gonna be like okay. like at this point, fuck it, right? who fucking cares, even. one of the characters is literally called garret the garbage man garrison and i feel like the entire thing doesn't take itself too seriously anyways so who even cares, it's gonna be a thing that exists and we have to just deal with it. it'd be a lot awesome if it was animated but, we have mc story mode, so, we didn't lose anything, we just didn't really gain anything either.

jack black as steve is just fucking weird, hes wearing a blue sweater over a blue t shirt they didn't fucking try like at all, but whatever.
maybe they'll rectify it by making a "Steve Black" or a "Jack Steve" skin where it's just steve but with jack black's head or something and also he's morbidly obese just to cope.
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i feel like i've experienced all 5 stages of grief and i'm now at acceptance
this shit is coming out in april 2025, they're not fixing it, the movie is over. it's honestly not the minecraft movie i would have wanted but it's probably gonna be like okay. like at this point, fuck it, right? who fucking cares, even. one of the characters is literally called garret the garbage man garrison and i feel like the entire thing doesn't take itself too seriously anyways so who even cares, it's gonna be a thing that exists and we have to just deal with it. it'd be a lot awesome if it was animated but, we have mc story mode, so, we didn't lose anything, we just didn't really gain anything either.

jack black as steve is just fucking weird, hes wearing a blue sweater over a blue t shirt they didn't fucking try like at all, but whatever.
maybe they'll rectify it by making a "Steve Black" or a "Jack Steve" skin where it's just steve but with jack black's head or something and also he's morbidly obese just to cope.
View attachment 38789
you know this is a movie for kids, right? nostalgia doesn’t matter, this is a kids movie.
 
i feel like i've experienced all 5 stages of grief and i'm now at acceptance
this shit is coming out in april 2025, they're not fixing it, the movie is over. it's honestly not the minecraft movie i would have wanted but it's probably gonna be like okay. like at this point, fuck it, right? who fucking cares, even. one of the characters is literally called garret the garbage man garrison and i feel like the entire thing doesn't take itself too seriously anyways so who even cares, it's gonna be a thing that exists and we have to just deal with it. it'd be a lot awesome if it was animated but, we have mc story mode, so, we didn't lose anything, we just didn't really gain anything either.

jack black as steve is just fucking weird, hes wearing a blue sweater over a blue t shirt they didn't fucking try like at all, but whatever.
maybe they'll rectify it by making a "Steve Black" or a "Jack Steve" skin where it's just steve but with jack black's head or something and also he's morbidly obese just to cope.
View attachment 38789
I am Steve
 
i feel like i've experienced all 5 stages of grief and i'm now at acceptance
this shit is coming out in april 2025, they're not fixing it, the movie is over. it's honestly not the minecraft movie i would have wanted but it's probably gonna be like okay. like at this point, fuck it, right? who fucking cares, even. one of the characters is literally called garret the garbage man garrison and i feel like the entire thing doesn't take itself too seriously anyways so who even cares, it's gonna be a thing that exists and we have to just deal with it. it'd be a lot awesome if it was animated but, we have mc story mode, so, we didn't lose anything, we just didn't really gain anything either.

jack black as steve is just fucking weird, hes wearing a blue sweater over a blue t shirt they didn't fucking try like at all, but whatever.
maybe they'll rectify it by making a "Steve Black" or a "Jack Steve" skin where it's just steve but with jack black's head or something and also he's morbidly obese just to cope.
View attachment 38789
idc ima waste my money on tickets n watching it w friends o algo
 
for some reason i wouldn't mind watching it too, just out of like irony watching.
a part of me hopes that it goes down the ironic route or something but it's probably not gonna.
Don't huff the copium, just know its gonna be bad and watch the shitshow once it comes out.
 
of course, you guys don’t care about what i’m saying because you’re all prepubescent and have no concept of nostalgia. for shame.
Nobody is talking about nostalgia except you basil. Minecraft isn't even a kids game it was developed on /v/ back in the late 2000s, just watch jurrasic park again or something you little kid.
 
Don't huff the copium, just know its gonna be bad and watch the shitshow once it comes out.
i keep rewatching the trailer and that one part where jack black says hes steve and mamoa says "yeah okay" just resonates with me
because nobody fucking cares honestly. you could add in a pipe falling sound effect, bruh sound effect or crickets and it would just captivate the feeling of the entire trailer or movie.
as in, its literally a movie nobody asked for. i hope it fails in the box office, to be honest. the cast, i don't like, but i feel like once it comes out we might get to know them a lil bit or something like that.
 
like honestly i think everyone's reaction to the teaser may have been visceral, in the same way people hated the fucking fnaf movie for having orange or red eyes or something and people hated the mario movie, i think it's probably one of those cases where it's going to be an okay movie regardless, like it just fucking looks weird and all but it's going to be a movie so it's whatever i guess.
 
Nobody is talking about nostalgia except you basil. Minecraft isn't even a kids game it was developed on /v/ back in the late 2000s, just watch jurrasic park again or something you little kid.
excuse me? microsoft bought the game now, it’s for kids now, okay, this isn’t the past, you’re referencing the past because your obviously nostalgic and want to view a movie made for 6 year olds.
 
i keep rewatching the trailer and that one part where jack black says hes steve and mamoa says "yeah okay" just resonates with me
because nobody fucking cares honestly. you could add in a pipe falling sound effect, bruh sound effect or crickets and it would just captivate the feeling of the entire trailer or movie.
as in, its literally a movie nobody asked for. i hope it fails in the box office, to be honest. the cast, i don't like, but i feel like once it comes out we might get to know them a lil bit or something like that.
People asked for this movie but it is damn not what they wanted I'll tell you that, its a tossup if its gonna be DOA or a success however, Minecraft is just such a large game its hard to see it flopping but on the otherhand it looks like shit.
excuse me? microsoft bought the game now, it’s for kids now, okay, this isn’t the past, you’re referencing the past because your obviously nostalgic and want to view a movie made for 6 year olds.
I don't even like minecraft that much, you know I'm much more of a terraria guy and that game held up a lot better as I grew older, silly boy.
 
i feel like when we all saw the mc movie teaser we thought it was gonna be faithful to minecraft but it really is just it's own thing now in my opinion.
minecraft story mode is better 10000% but imo the movie is just going to exist and you can't really stop that. hopefully mamoa's character provides us with comic relief i guess, like he looks like the kind of guy to say "what the fuck is this load of shit" and maybe the cast are self aware and say some shit like "yeah this place sucks dick" but the autistic child is really enthusiastic and the black girl is addicted to minecraft melon and minecraft cooked chicken and jack black is really just a nothing burger character who pretends to be better than he really is but in actuality he's just a meme, or maybe he's not the real steve, also idk if alex is going to make an appearance like

like this is just a really fucking weird movie
why is steve in it why is jack black steve, is alex going to be in it? apparently dantdm is gonna be there too like
i just
i dont even know what they were thinking
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