• Happy pride month, xisters of the schlog!

Autism Slay The Grand Soycerer: The Forum Game

Based off of the "Destroy the Godmodder" games on different forums, the premise is that one day you log onto the 'sharty and find out it's been taken over by a corrupt soycerer with great power trying to burn it to the ground. However, the great spirit of soy burns within you and every other apprentice soycerer trying to fight back.

It's not an easy task though, the soycerer is well-versed in all types of attacks ranging from brimstone to tanzanite, and can block many of them. Your goal is to post attacks that can damage the grand soycerer for 0-10 damage depending on how gemmy it is. The soycerer doesn't attack directly, so don't worry about being defeated.

Guidelines:
1. If you couldn't tell already this has roleplay elements.
2. The soycerer and his constructs cannot be healed.
3. You only get 1 attack per turn, as in, if I haven't processed your attack yet, you can't double-attack. Also note that trying to do two different attacks in one post is discouraged unless it's gemmy. Your attack may be straight up ignored if it's something like "I rape the soycerer then shoot him with a gun then summon a lightning strike then laugh at him and then steal his KFC."
4. The player cannot summon their own constructs that stay in the battlefield after the round is over.
5. Me and @Meursault are the only ones that can process attacks. If you see someone else saying "this attack failed", ignore them.

THE GRAND SOYCERER EMERGES WITH 250HP!
 
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i shall quote him with a brown hanging troonjak, as is custom on the 'ru
1711671080758064.jpg
 
i shall quote him with a brown hanging troonjak, as is custom on the 'ru
View attachment 5395
The soycerer was caught slightly off guard that an apprentice approached him but quickly deletes your post. He takes 1 damage

CURRENT HP: 249

Note that attacks don't necessarily have to be 'sharty or even internet culture related.
 
Summoned Alicia above the sorcerer, which directly hit him in the face with xir rotting neovag, dealing toxic and acid damage.
View attachment 5417
The soycerer is actually disgusted by trannies despite making BBC and tranny bait posts. He doesn't go outside so this is his first time ever (aww!) seeing a tranny upclose and he is greatly horrified. He takes 7 damage. He hopes his fellow fans (who?) don't notice so he summons a BASIC DISCORD TRANNY to do something or something.

CURRENT HP: 242/250
BASIC DISCORD TRANNY: 10/10
 
permanently shred evil sorcerer's clothes using undressing ability and then while his naked proceed to summon Odin to bucket break the evil sorcerer.
63745 - SoyBooru.png
 
permanently shred evil sorcerer's clothes using undressing ability and then while his naked proceed to summon Odin to bucket break the evil sorcerer.View attachment 5497
The discord tranny redirects the undressing ability to xirself and gets buck broken by Odin instead. Xir ass takes 1 damage but xe's otherwise fine due to enjoying it. The grand soycerer leaves them in privacy and takes 0 damage.

GRAND SOYCERER: 242/250 HP
BASIC DISCORD TRANNY: 9/10 HP

oh and put gate card on the battlefield.

forgot to mention you can only do 1 attack per turn, will add to the OP
 
The discord tranny redirects the undressing ability to xirself and gets buck broken by Odin instead. Xir ass takes 1 damage but xe's otherwise fine due to enjoying it. The grand soycerer leaves them in privacy and takes 0 damage.

GRAND SOYCERER: 242/250 HP
BASIC DISCORD TRANNY: 9/10 HP



forgot to mention you can only do 1 attack per turn, will add to the OP
Odin stays on the battlefield to shield me.

Ability Card Active: Doom Card.

Any opponent's bakugan will be sent to Doom Dimension after the match is over, including NPCs.
 
Odin stays on the battlefield to shield me.

Ability Card Active: Doom Card.

Any opponent's bakugan will be sent to Doom Dimension after the match is over, including NPCs.
He stays on the battlefield. The Soycerer doesn't understand the point of the Doom Card as he does not use bakugan.

View attachment 14994
I summon fnf the ultimate diddler, to frighten him.
The stench of the fnf diddler assaults the soycerers nose for 2 damage before he summons nose guards to cover his nose!

The basic discord tranny is ready to protect the grand soycerer from the fnf diddler until xe begins to feel nostalgic for the days when xe got groomed on 'cord.

"You're just like my childhood best friend!" xe says.

"WE WAZ GROOMERS N SHIEEEET" the fnf pedo says back.

"Discord Tranny! I can turn you into an XX biol- cis woman! He's just gonna use you for sex!" says the soycerer.

"Heck, I don't know who to trust. Why should I trust you when you've never used my real name once?" says the tranny.

"What's your name, Tranny?" asks the fnf pedo.

"Luna Rosemary Sage!" xe says.

"Okay Luna-" the soycerer was interrupted.

"Rosemary-" the FNF pedo was interrupted.

"Sage!" the soycerer finished.

"I'M SORRY ALL THESE DEMANDS TRIGGER MY HECKING AUTISM"

"Luna" starts sobbing and is rendered useless for the next two turns!

CURRENT HP: 240/250
"LUNA" THE DISCORD TRANNY: 9/10
 
I use my radio uplink to call in an orbital bombardment from one of my Thrasher destroyers (leftover from that time I tried running a sharty corp in EVE online), resulting in several dozen 280mm phased plasma artillery shells raining down upon the the Soyceror's position, dealing very heavy thermal damage.
 
I use my radio uplink to call in an orbital bombardment from one of my Thrasher destroyers (leftover from that time I tried running a sharty corp in EVE online), resulting in several dozen 280mm phased plasma artillery shells raining down upon the the Soyceror's position, dealing very heavy thermal damage.
The Soyceror sees the sky raining hell and builds an underground tunnel, unfortunately "Luna" is too busy crying to step inside and takes 5 damage, 1 from the heat boiling xir insides and 4 from emotional damage after xir makeup falls off.

"Touch grass they said... well dirt's just as good!" says the soycerer.

CURRENT HP: 240/250
"LUNA" THE DISCORD TRANNY: 4/10

geeeeeeeg OP disappeared like a discord tranny's father
My bad, I got sidetracked but I'm back now. [wholesome]
 
I grab a UMP45, mount a flashlight to it, and storm the tunnel complex so I can give the Soycerer the iron supplements he's been missing, in pill form, delivered with experimental new Just Shoot The FuckerTM technology
 
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