Digital Memopad

found some spergy underweight gun-obsessed mulatto girl on the 4cuck dating app
she's rather clingy but i don't seem to mind it
i don't have high expectations though
not really dating and that probably wont happen for a while
we'll just have to wait and see
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i may or may not have gotten into... well, a relationship, with a human female (XX), very recently [wholesome]

unfortunately it's online, though at least we're in the same country. i'm well aware that this stuff often fizzles out quickly, but this woman seems rather... unique in my eyes. i won't go too far into detail but it involves religion heavily, which is something i desperately need in my life. not just for salvation, but to get my moral compass calibrated and out of this shithole i dug myself into during the past 2-3 years.
we've verified our identities using the old-school timestamp selfie method, even sent a few voice messages to each other.
my approach going forward is simple: if it doesn't work out, that's fine. no biggie. i do believe most things happen for a reason, and at least i'll still have a decent morale boost. God is at the helm now, i've been quite honest with this woman and she seems to be willing to accept me despite my moderate flaws. she's got a few issues of her own too, but honestly she's a lot better off than me.
again, i'm not going to get all obsessed about this and center my life around it. even normal people don't do that. i'll just assume it was a little divine blessing of sorts, even though i don't know its future implications at the moment. it does seem rather unique to me though, considering i've had several close friends online and nothing ever went like this.
that's all.
 
i may or may not have gotten into... well, a relationship, with a human female (XX), very recently [wholesome]

unfortunately it's online, though at least we're in the same country. i'm well aware that this stuff often fizzles out quickly, but this woman seems rather... unique in my eyes. i won't go too far into detail but it involves religion heavily, which is something i desperately need in my life. not just for salvation, but to get my moral compass calibrated and out of this shithole i dug myself into during the past 2-3 years.
we've verified our identities using the old-school timestamp selfie method, even sent a few voice messages to each other.
my approach going forward is simple: if it doesn't work out, that's fine. no biggie. i do believe most things happen for a reason, and at least i'll still have a decent morale boost. God is at the helm now, i've been quite honest with this woman and she seems to be willing to accept me despite my moderate flaws. she's got a few issues of her own too, but honestly she's a lot better off than me.
again, i'm not going to get all obsessed about this and center my life around it. even normal people don't do that. i'll just assume it was a little divine blessing of sorts, even though i don't know its future implications at the moment. it does seem rather unique to me though, considering i've had several close friends online and nothing ever went like this.
that's all.
would've been better for u to get one irl, but if it works then it works.
 
would've been better for u to get one irl, but if it works then it works.
Absolutely, that's a reasonable opinion to have. And ordinarily I wouldn't put so much faith into an online relationship, but I do believe she is quite unique.
I won't say too much other than she's kinda "spergy" but one of the more sheltered kinds, and seems to have an overwhelming aura of positivity/hope that doesn't seem fabricated. It rubs off onto me, which I've never experienced before.
 
Absolutely, that's a reasonable opinion to have. And ordinarily I wouldn't put so much faith into an online relationship, but I do believe she is quite unique.
I won't say too much other than she's kinda "spergy" but one of the more sheltered kinds, and seems to have an overwhelming aura of positivity/hope that doesn't seem fabricated. It rubs off onto me, which I've never experienced before.
You're good with vibes, god bless
 
I got bored this afternoon and started looking through religious Wikipedia articles just out of curiosity. Mainly ones associated with the Abrahamic religions. I'm well aware that Wikipedia isn't exactly a good place to look for this stuff, but I figured it would be an accessible place to start.

It was pretty fascinating, honestly. Even with how Wikipedia articles are dumbed-down and streamlined I found myself feeling "small", almost? There's so much depth to all of it, with concepts and stories that all somehow manage to form a handful of coherent narratives. I was raised a Christian and often went to church during most of my childhood-early teenage years, but I feel like what they taught us there wasn't even beginning to scratch the surface of what's out there. In fact, it's painfully clear to me that they likely warped and twisted some of the teachings to make it all fit how they wanted us to feel about Christ and the Bible. I'm sure some of that was done merely to make it easy to comprehend for our stupid kid minds, but it still makes me feel a little weird.

To call it a rabbit hole would be a vast understatement. I might start reading about this stuff regularly. Would be fun to discuss with people I know.
Yeah I sound retarded, that's okay.
 
i had a two hour voice call with my um female friend tonight and it went surprisingly well, was a little awkward for 10 minutes but things eventually shifted into gear
mostly just talking about stupid shit and sometimes we'd bitch about our lives and laugh
felt surreal almost, those 120 minutes felt more like 10. i was very nervous about it all but somehow i've managed to win another roll of the dice

[wholesome]
 
i had a two hour voice call with my um female friend tonight and it went surprisingly well, was a little awkward for 10 minutes but things eventually shifted into gear
mostly just talking about stupid shit and sometimes we'd bitch about our lives and laugh
felt surreal almost, those 120 minutes felt more like 10. i was very nervous about it all but somehow i've managed to win another roll of the dice

[wholesome]
i always imagine ur voice to be high pitch and soft spoken
 
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