Digital Memopad

I'm going to get an associate degree and become part of working class America, that's my only route forward and I hate the elites even though I'll be a slave for them but that's okay because we made them have a nuclear clitty meltdown on the 5th
I love being retarded, I remember during driving lessons other kids would drive the car and they"d have conversations with the instructor. They'd all talk about how they're going to a prestigious university, their $65,000 first car, their future medical careers. It opened my eyes to the fact that race really isn't the main thing dividing people, it's really just a class problem at the end of the day. Elite white people hate blue collar whites and I wouldn't doubt the average DEI black person with a PhD thinks rural black Americans are the scum of the Earth.
associates degree in wat
 
Dad had to x-ray some nonbinary guy at work today, he said the guy was nice but seemed very misguided and vulnerable.
 
I'm going to get an associate degree and become part of working class America, that's my only route forward and I hate the elites even though I'll be a slave for them but that's okay because we made them have a nuclear clitty meltdown on the 5th
I love being retarded, I remember during driving lessons other kids would drive the car and they"d have conversations with the instructor. They'd all talk about how they're going to a prestigious university, their $65,000 first car, their future medical careers. It opened my eyes to the fact that race really isn't the main thing dividing people, it's really just a class problem at the end of the day. Elite white people hate blue collar whites and I wouldn't doubt the average DEI black person with a PhD thinks rural black Americans are the scum of the Earth.
Just give up. It's a lot easier. I did a long time ago. There's not really much of a point to it all anyway.
 
I managed to play a game for over two hours straight today, I guess the ADHD medicine wasn't helping me after all. That's not exactly an achievement to be proud of, but not too long ago I couldn't play a game for more than 30 minutes. And that's shit that I like doing, I can't imagine how bad it'd be if it was work-related.

My mom got some Starbucks pods for the coffee maker and they're pretty good. Unfortunately it's going to be sunny and cold all week, my least favorite type of weather. Two more days until I can get off the antipsychotics. I've said that they put me on them for anger issues, but now that I think about it they made my anger worse. I remembered to take out the trash last night (just as I was about to relax) and I suddenly got so white-hot pissed off with sheer rage that I ended up having a headache after it wore off.
 
Had a dream where i was back in high school and some short white kid (who was a reporter for the school news thingy) walked up to me and asked "Ayo bro who's your waifu" and i was like "Uuuuh koyomi mizuhara bro" and he started laughing his ass off and the next day everyone was calling me a loser
 
Just got done with the appointment, will be off both antipsychotics before Christmas. It will probably take even longer for the damage to be repaired (was on them for 2+ years) but that's okay.
Really a breath of fresh air. For the past few months it's been difficult to even get out of bed and take a shower. I'm sure many of you are well-aware of how poorly I've behaved on this site lately.
 
Just got done with the appointment, will be off both antipsychotics before Christmas. It will probably take even longer for the damage to be repaired (was on them for 2+ years) but that's okay.
Really a breath of fresh air. For the past few months it's been difficult to even get out of bed and take a shower. I'm sure many of you are well-aware of how poorly I've behaved on this site lately.
some damage might be irreparable but it's like smoking, may as well stop doing it before it kills you
I miss my dog it's been a year, i hope she is happy wherever she is
i feel you. i don't know what i'll do when my dog passes on
 
some damage might be irreparable but it's like smoking, may as well stop doing it before it kills you
I remember some tranny online telling me it would take years off of my lifespan in a genuinely serious tone, and I will admit that they were telling the truth after I looked up some mortality studies. Risperidone specifically was the worst, and with Abilify in the mix I don't know how long I would've lived if I stayed on this shit for a decade or something. 3 years is already bad enough.

i feel you. i don't know what i'll do when my dog passes on
The first week is always the worst, then you kinda "forget" for a while, and then a few months later you'll start to have little episodes where you remember and get put in a bad mood. At least that's how it works for me.
 
I remember some tranny online telling me it would take years off of my lifespan in a genuinely serious tone, and I will admit that they were telling the truth after I looked up some mortality studies. Risperidone specifically was the worst, and with Abilify in the mix I don't know how long I would've lived if I stayed on this shit for a decade or something. 3 years is already bad enough.
(yap yap yap)
There are some days where I remark on how modern medicine is a wonder and how I thank God on how He enlightened men and women alike to create new and safer ways to treat medical conditions, both deadly or not, chronic or acute, severe or mild. But then there are days where I remember that doctors are actively giving chemical lobotomizers (like you said) to children and teenagers your age. It's not fair. How do these kind of people even get a degree to begin with? They must know the effect of the medicine they're handing out before actually prescribing them, especially to younger youths. I already feel out-of-touch with the 2 SSRIs I'm on, imagine how you've must've felt for these past 2 years. Shit is so despicable yet there's nothing I (or you for that matter) could do.
 
The first week is always the worst, then you kinda "forget" for a while, and then a few months later you'll start to have little episodes where you remember and get put in a bad mood. At least that's how it works for me.
yeah i get that since i had a hamster once but i've had my dog my entire life and i break down thinking about it happening
 
(yap yap yap)
There are some days where I remark on how modern medicine is a wonder and how I thank God on how He enlightened men and women alike to create new and safer ways to treat medical conditions, both deadly or not, chronic or acute, severe or mild. But then there are days where I remember that doctors are actively giving chemical lobotomizers (like you said) to children and teenagers your age. It's not fair. How do these kind of people even get a degree to begin with? They must know the effect of the medicine they're handing out before actually prescribing them, especially to younger youths. I already feel out-of-touch with the 2 SSRIs I'm on, imagine how you've must've felt for these past 2 years. Shit is so despicable yet there's nothing I (or you for that matter) could do.
I've always assumed it was mostly an American thing, and I'm sure you know what that (((means))). Not even joking for the most part, I hate to blame those people for everything but yeah.
People have called me an idiot for not just throwing the pills away, and I have to tell them that the single time I tried, I got caught and my father went absolutely fucking ballistic. Not really angry at him for that, though it makes me sad that these psychiatrist people are so good at fear-mongering and making struggling parents believe they NEED to put their kids on meds. The food in my country is already poison made for profit, and then the effects of that on people get treated with more poison.
Anyway, I even ended up abusing my Ritalin just so it would "cancel out" the antipsychotics for a brief period sometimes. The FDA here doesn't even mention those medications as suitable for treating autism (because it's a neurological disorder and not a chemical issue), they just randomly decided to say they can treat specific symptoms. People don't understand how those pills are high-caliber shit.

If I may ask, what SSRIs are you on? I despise that class of drug myself, but at least they don't completely rape your brain. Being on two must be rough though.
 
I.T. computer nigger garbage really, it's all that i'm competent at
fucking retarded, it’s gonna be such a bloated β€œprofession” in a few years because of retards like you who have no experience with anything except technology.
 
If I may ask, what SSRIs are you on? I despise that class of drug myself, but at least they don't completely rape your brain. Being on two must be rough though.
I already mentioned I was on Escilatopram (Lexapro, don't know if you've heard of it), 10mg, one pill a day. It supposedly helps with anxiety but I'm still very upset at the fact that it has had no noticeable effect for me.
I am also on Seroquel, I think 5-10mg (which is much lower than your normal sperg dosage, mostly meant to help a little bit with anger).

Unrelated but my grandmother is also on SSRIs because she has anxiety and anger issues (severe, I remember her almost killing me when I was younger)
 
fucking retarded, it’s gonna be such a bloated β€œprofession” in a few years because of retards like you who have no experience with anything except technology.
i bet you're going to do something smart. not like him. he's so dumb. you're so smart for not doing that.
 
Side note and completely unrelated but when I say that I hate autistic people I'm being somewhat truthful. (no, Aspergers and Autism are not the same and they never will be)
 
Aspergers and Autism are not the same
I really don't understand why they decided to merge the two labels into just "ASD" here in muttland. I won't pretend like I'm a particularly bright or successful person, but it's patronizing that I've essentially been lumped into the same group as 40yo nonverbal men who shit in diapers and watch Thomas the Train all day.
 
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