Datamining Non-Anonymous Confession Thread

[Stephen]

Admit whatever you want other people to know from you here
I do not like strawberries

 

[neetyos]

im on blog.soyjak.st as i'm writing this

 

[1844 or Something]

I never watched any YTPs because there was a spongebob one with jumpscares and it made me cry. I was about 12, and i was watching it with my little brother who was completely unaffected. I also couldn't watch horror movies until I was 15, and I still fucking hate them.

 

[greg]

I remember pissing on a piece of paper on my table one time for no reason

 

[baqqrih]

I never watched any YTPs because there was a spongebob one with jumpscares and it made me cry. I was about 12, and i was watching it with my little brother who was completely unaffected. I also couldn't watch horror movies until I was 15, and I still fucking hate them.

Was it this one? I was unsettled by this one when I was younger because of the singing android at the beginning.

 

[jimbo]

Was it this one? I was unsettled by this one when I was younger because of the singing android at the beginning.

this one's better

 

[1844 or Something]

Was it this one? I was unsettled by this one when I was younger because of the singing android at the beginning.

No, it was a ytp of the treasure-hunt episode from what I remember

 

[Thrembolone]

I never watched any YTPs because there was a spongebob one with jumpscares and it made me cry. I was about 12, and i was watching it with my little brother who was completely unaffected. I also couldn't watch horror movies until I was 15, and I still fucking hate them.

Dude same except i still cant play horror games alone

 

[MoonMetropolis]

Okay. You want my confession? Here it is. Yes, I go on /pol/. Wanna know why? I first started going on 4chan in Grade 8 after I got my head put through a wall by Zac Rasmussen, the arrogant fuck. I had no friends, I had no social contact whatsoever. 4chan filled the void that being able to go an entire day without opening my mouth once had left in my brain. Reddit didn't exist at the time. On 4chan I developed an interest in /v/ - Video Games, /tg/ - Traditional Games, /sci/ - Science and Maths, /r9k/ - Robot9001, /k/ - Weapons and yes /new/ - News (which would later become /pol/ - Politically Incorrect) and recently /lgbt/ - Faggots. I'm glad that you feel so secure and loved by the people around you that you don't need to visit places like 4chan where you can wallow in self-pity. I'm glad that you're part of a community like Reddit where everyone is so well adjusted you don't ever feel the need to call someone a stupid degenerate fucking goy because they're being a total fucking retard. I'm glad that you can just downvote someone into oblivion when they say something you don't like and don't have to sit there and watch him and his friends all gather around and circle jerk about it. I'm glad that you're so fucking well adjusted that you don't feel the need to jump in and call that guy a cunt and a nigger and everything else you can think up. So I'm sorry I go on /pol/. I'm sorry if that offends you. I wish I didn't have to. I wish communities like this wouldn't throw people like me out because we're not nice enough and not civil enough. I'm sorry every second word out of my mouth is nigger and every third one is faggot. I'm sorry that the only people on the internet who want to talk to me are racists, kikes and losers. But I'm also sorry that you'll never be exposed to a community that's violent, acerbic and barbed and you'll never grow a skin thick enough to matter. I'm sorry that you'll never come to the realisation that ignoring things doesn't make them go away. I'm especially sorry that you'll never have the discussion that I did with a man who, despite being a convicted gay basher, has a wife and three kids that he loves very much that made me realise that as much as I disagree with him, and as strongly as I disagree with him, he's still a person who has his viewpoint for a reason and I need to engage with him regardless of his background or mine.

 

[1844 or Something]

Dude same except i still cant play horror games alone

I never liked horror games, but for some reason I had no problem with playing fallout alone in the dark (particularly The Pitt and Sierra Madre, very spooky)
Maybe it's the agency of actually being in control, but I hated horror movies and LOVED exploring some horrific dark shithole in fallout

 

[1844 or Something]

When I was a kid, I didn't know how to snap. Anytime we needed to snap for some gay classroom song, I would just stand there saying "snap" over and over like a retard

 

[Chesnaught]

I almost burned our house down when I was ~2-3. I would just light shit on fire, something I still do. I'm smarter about it now thoughever. I was also really good at taking those childproofing doorknob covers off and so I went streaking at midnight when I was around that age.

 

[Goot]

I almost burned our house down when I was ~2-3. I would just light shit on fire, something I still do. I'm smarter about it now thoughever. I was also really good at taking those childproofing doorknob covers off and so I went streaking at midnight when I was around that age.

Based arsonist

 

[Chesnaught]

When I was ~8, I had semi-detailed plans to break into the local mall at night and steal something. It almost certainly would have been a failburger, but I regret not trying, as I think I was still young enough to get away with it.

 

[Steve]

I almost burned our house down when I was ~2-3. I would just light shit on fire, something I still do. I'm smarter about it now thoughever. I was also really good at taking those childproofing doorknob covers off and so I went streaking at midnight when I was around that age.

I almost burned down the house because I was using a paper towel as a pot holder once and the roll caught aflame and I had to get shoes to stomp it out.

 

[SoytanEnthusiast]

When I was a kid, I didn't know how to snap. Anytime we needed to snap for some gay classroom song, I would just stand there saying "snap" over and over like a retard

Holy same, I learned to snap like 2 years ago

 

[8doe]

When I was 8 I was on Roblox and this was when the party feature still existed and I was friends with these two girls and one of them joined a Roblox sex game and it forced both me and the other girl in it. This was on the family computer which was right next to the kitchen where my mom and dad were making dinner. I frantically tried closing the game cause it said 18+ on it and it reopened cause I was in the party. Luckily my parents didn’t notice or find out

 

[Goot]

I'm the only one of my brothers that isn't a uncanny soy caricature
It's BAD

 

[Goot]

I once was so good at arm farts i could do all 4 (that means knees too)

 

[8doe]

When I was 8 I was on Roblox and this was when the party feature still existed and I was friends with these two girls and one of them joined a Roblox sex game and it forced both me and the other girl in it. This was on the family computer which was right next to the kitchen where my mom and dad were making dinner. I frantically tried closing the game cause it said 18+ on it and it reopened cause I was in the party. Luckily my parents didn’t notice or find out

Oh and when I was 4 I was on the bus with my mom and I saw a black guy and I pointed to him and I asked why he was brown while directly locking eyes with him. He didn’t say anything but my mom was like “Don’t say that, that’s rude”