Schizo I’m obsessed with setting things on fire.

[snuffereet]

A few weeks ago I lit my trash can on fire. I was enraptured watching the embers chew away at the napkins, tissues and cardboard in the bin. I needed more. I would start setting notebooks on fire, cards from my family, even paper money, taxes and bills. The more detrimental to my life the fire consumed, the more pleasure I derived from it. I would hover my sweaty palms above a burning lighter and let the flames nip and boil my hands. Sometimes I would dip it down and see if I developed any blisters. I started to set more and more things on fire. I would envelop the firewood in the backyard in a raging inferno, then ignite the shed harboring the tools of the action. Eventually my desires for arson grew beyond managing just inanimate objects. I would trap squirrels and birds in cages with feeders inside then light them on fire. I would stare completely blank at the critters wheezing and wailing in agony as the air in their lungs combust and stare until a charred piece of meat is all that remained of my victim. I would go to the pet store and buy fish to boil them in their habitats, and various domesticated rodents to which I would spray aerosol on them and light the mist, coating them in a tornado of hellfire singing the fur off of their body and drying their beady eyes into a blackened marble. It still wasn’t enough. I would lure unsupervised dogs and cats outside into cages, pour a canister of gasoline on them, then flick a lit match onto the edge and watch as the heat consumed them. Every single time it was like time would slow down and I’d watch the flame slowly engulf their back to their head. Sometimes they were strays, sometimes they were family pets. Yesterday I did something bold. I drove to my local trailer park at night with a canister of gasoline and a small tank of propane. I found a trailer sort of obscured from the rest, and I made sure to check that there were no cameras that could record me doing my greatest work so far. I peeked inside and the house was empty - except for an infant sleeping in a crib. I doused the perimeter of the trailer in gasoline then buried the propane underneath the room where the baby slept dormant. I lit a match and dropped it near the gasoline and ran as fast as I could. I was in the forest almost pitch black when I looked back and saw a hazy red glow. Then, a flash of light and a shockwave that nearly brought me to the ground struck. It felt good. I want to burn an adult human next, any ideas?

 

[snuffereet]

I’m spreading my bootycheeks

 

[MoonMetropolis]

Holy fucking shit. I want to bang the Soyjaks.party mascot so goddamn bad. I can't stand it anymore. Every time I go to the sharty I get a massive erection. I've seen literally every rule 34 post there is of her online. My dreams are nothing but constant fucking sex with Soytan. I'm sick of waking up every morning with six nuts in my boxers and knowing that those are nuts that should've been busted inside of Soytan's tight nu-male pussy. I want her to have my babies.

 

[snuffereet]

Holy fucking shit. I want to bang the Soyjaks.party mascot so goddamn bad. I can't stand it anymore. Every time I go to the sharty I get a massive erection. I've seen literally every rule 34 post there is of her online. My dreams are nothing but constant fucking sex with Soytan. I'm sick of waking up every morning with six nuts in my boxers and knowing that those are nuts that should've been busted inside of Soytan's tight nu-male pussy. I want her to have my wizards.

Is it normal to have poop get stuck halfway out of your anus? I was browsing /soy/ yesterday on the toilet fullpage soyquoting bait threads without saging them, and a frognigger kept kekking at me. I was getting annoyed and tried to clench my asshole when the poop log coming out blocked it from contracting. I waited like 5 minutes for the 10 inch turd to fall out but it just wouldn’t budge. I tried wiggling my torso, lifting my legs, and pissing really hard - yet nothing worked. Eventually I got frustrated and reached my hand underneath my hairy, scratchy balls and yanked the poop out. It broke off, but the upper half of the shit was still in my rectum. I got up from the toilet seat (which had a little bit of shit marks on it) and started digging the shit out of my asshole with my bare hands. Eventually enough poop came out that I didn’t feel constipated anymore. I scooped the feces off of the floor and tossed it into the toilet bowl, and it kind of looked like a soyjak (shitjak reference? oldGODs would understand) so I took a picture of it and soyquoted the frogcaca with it. All without washing my hands btw. Xhe still hasn’t responded.

 

[MoonMetropolis]

Is it normal to have poop get stuck halfway out of your anus? I was browsing /soy/ yesterday on the toilet fullpage soyquoting bait threads without saging them, and a frognigger kept kekking at me. I was getting annoyed and tried to clench my asshole when the poop log coming out blocked it from contracting. I waited like 5 minutes for the 10 inch turd to fall out but it just wouldn’t budge. I tried wiggling my torso, lifting my legs, and pissing really hard - yet nothing worked. Eventually I got frustrated and reached my hand underneath my hairy, scratchy balls and yanked the poop out. It broke off, but the upper half of the shit was still in my rectum. I got up from the toilet seat (which had a little bit of shit marks on it) and started digging the shit out of my asshole with my bare hands. Eventually enough poop came out that I didn’t feel constipated anymore. I scooped the feces off of the floor and tossed it into the toilet bowl, and it kind of looked like a soyjak (shitjak reference? oldGODs would understand) so I took a picture of it and soyquoted the frogcaca with it. All without washing my hands btw. Xhe still hasn’t responded.

Finally some good bait.

I'm glad we are in the company of a genius like yourself who knows the weeks of planning that goes behind any of these decisions. Surely you wouldn't be thinking I only listen to one person spamming in red text when I make a choice, after all you're a very incredibly brilliant mind. You'd probably also know that I've been speaking with past soyteens and current soyteens about what they think of the site and what they'd like changed. I'm thinking your mind is wasted here making 140 character twitter clapbacks, and you should probably apply for MIT or as a police detective since you are so certain of the things that have happened without any evidence or thought put into it by yourself.

I'll be home in an hour or so.