Poot
Former sharty owner
- Joined
- Oct 21, 2024
- Messages
- 221
My daughter, Emily (formerly Eric), came out as transgender about two years ago at the age of 28. While I was surprised, I’ve done my best to be supportive—using her chosen name, pronouns, and even helping her navigate coming out to extended family. However, recently, she asked me to help pay for her gender-affirming care, including hormone therapy and potential surgeries. I told her that while I love and support her, I don’t feel financially responsible for covering these costs, especially since she’s a full-grown adult with a job.
She was devastated by my response, saying that transitioning is essential to her well-being and that if I truly supported her, I would help her afford these treatments. She pointed out that I had covered major expenses for her in the past, like part of her college tuition and a down payment on a car when she was younger. While that’s true, I feel like those were different—helping her establish independence versus funding elective medical procedures. I told her that if it’s important to her, she should prioritize saving for it like any other major life goal. This led to a huge argument, and she accused me of only supporting her "on paper" but not in practice.
Now, she’s barely speaking to me, and a few family members have taken her side, saying that if I truly loved my daughter, I would help her however I could. Others agree with me, saying that at 30, she should be financially responsible for herself. I’m torn—on one hand, I want to support her, but on the other, I don’t think it’s fair to expect me to pay for this. So, schlog, AITA?
She was devastated by my response, saying that transitioning is essential to her well-being and that if I truly supported her, I would help her afford these treatments. She pointed out that I had covered major expenses for her in the past, like part of her college tuition and a down payment on a car when she was younger. While that’s true, I feel like those were different—helping her establish independence versus funding elective medical procedures. I told her that if it’s important to her, she should prioritize saving for it like any other major life goal. This led to a huge argument, and she accused me of only supporting her "on paper" but not in practice.
Now, she’s barely speaking to me, and a few family members have taken her side, saying that if I truly loved my daughter, I would help her however I could. Others agree with me, saying that at 30, she should be financially responsible for herself. I’m torn—on one hand, I want to support her, but on the other, I don’t think it’s fair to expect me to pay for this. So, schlog, AITA?
